There is no war on Christmas.
Okay, hold on, that’s a lie. There is a War on Christmas, but there are not the combatants you think there are.
Everyone has heard about hordes of Atheists trying to quash the wonder that is Christmas by turning it into some sort of happy cultural-sensitivity bullshit festival. That’s not true. Atheists like getting together on cold days the same as anyone else. Every culture on Earth has a holiday to get through the shitty months of their climate. I’m not going to belittle Christmas. Christians have done a good enough job of that, as have retailers.
Firstly: If you’re not in Church, you’ve already messed up. It’s Christ’s mass. Gift-giving traditionally occurs on the Epiphany, observing the night the Magi came to Bethlehem and presented their gifts to the King of Kings (And Lord of Lords). Of course, you might be descended from some group of joyless Protestants, and even refuse to observe that holiday, but that’s a gripe for another day.
Secondly, if you’re giving gifts, you’re probably letting them take over your holiday. People shuffle into the stores and obediently wait their turn to be fleeced by retailers. It’s degrading, and no one likes it. The customers get up early for door-busters. The associates have to trundle to work and break their asses. The managers get chest-pains fussing about numbers. The people who made the product are… well, let’s be honest, effectively slaves.
Thirdly, one day of the year is not a good platform for proselytizing. “Keep Christ in Christmas” stickers merely remind everyone else that Christians are joyless jerks that want to arrange society to their pre-conceived notions. We really need to re-think this holiday entirely.
If you’re on facebook, you’ve seen the little messages circulating that say you should shop locally. That’s a start, as you cannot quit consumerism cold-turkey. There are a huge number of stores that would like your business. They are probably more expensive than the big box stores, but here’s the solution to that sticky wicket… buy less stuff. A lot of products are made for Black Friday and have fewer features, or are intentionally lower-quality, so forget about it.
Also, if you must buy things, and that locally-produced lemon-zest soap is just too silly, buy board games. Why? Because even the first thing you do with a gift is you try it out. You can set up the board game and play with the recipient, and because you have a whole day off, you actually have the time to enjoy the board game with them. They can wear the sweater or play Field-Duty of Heroes IX any other day of the year… and buy it on their own.
Have a Happy Thanksgiving.